According to Cozy Mysteries… and also real life.
Look, I’m not saying cupcakes are magical.
I’m just saying I’ve never seen anyone eat a fresh, still-warm vanilla cupcake and say,
“Wow, that made everything worse.”
There are simply some situations in life that baked goods were scientifically designed to handle, and as someone who writes culinary cozy mysteries… I feel qualified to create this list.
Here we go.
1. Bad day? Eat a spoonful of cookie dough. Instant reboot.
You know that feeling when the whole day is a mess and you’re two seconds from snapping at someone who doesn’t deserve it?
Solution:
A scoop of cookie dough the size of your face.
Chocolate chip works wonders.
Oatmeal raisin is for people who need to feel like they made a responsible decision.
2. Someone’s being dramatic? Offer them a cupcake.
Cupcakes defuse tension like nothing else on earth.
No one can fight while holding a cupcake.
It’s science. (Probably.)
3. You said something awkward and want to disappear.
Cake.
Preferably layered.
The more layers, the less you think about that thing you said that now lives rent-free in your head at 3 a.m.
4. You need to bribe someone? Croissants work.
Flaky pastries are basically currency.
Need a favor?
Croissant.
Need forgiveness?
Chocolate croissants.
Need someone to forget you asked a highly suspicious question like “Where were you last night between 8 and 10?”
Almond croissants.
5. You’re avoiding your problems? Donuts help with the avoidance.
Sometimes you’re not ready to solve your problems.
Sometimes you’re only ready to eat about it.
Respect the process.
6. Relationship drama? Ice cream smooths everything over.
It’s comforting.
It’s nostalgic.
It requires zero chewing, which leaves more time for introspection.
This is why ice cream is emotionally advanced.
7. Someone in town turns up dead?
Okay, hear me out…
In cozy mysteries, the murderer always underestimates the power of:
1. Friendship
2. A determined amateur sleuth
3. Baked goods
If our girl Ava from my Frosted Misfortunes Mysteries has taught me anything, it’s this:
There is nothing and I really mean NOTHING that can’t be improved by:
- a warm kitchen
- a cute cat
- and a pastry chef who refuses to mind her own business
Crime solving?
Throw in a brownie.
Emotional breakdown?
Have a slice of cheesecake.
Accused of murder?
Cupcakes AND cookies.
Served a la mode.
8. When all else fails, bake something.
Even if it doesn’t solve the problem… it gives you:
- control
- comfort
- carbs
- and a kitchen that smells like happiness
Honestly?
Isn’t that a win?!
If you want more baked-goods-fix-everything energy…
Ava’s first three crime-filled, cupcake-powered adventures are bundled in one bingeable Frosted Misfortunes Box Set.
But don’t worry, this post wasn’t a sales pitch.
It was a public service announcement.
Baked goods fix things.
We just live in the world.
